Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck are some of the char...
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I know there are many camps out there as to how to raise your kids.  There’s the Dr. Spock method, there’s “it takes a village”, there’s timeouts vs spanking, but for me, there’s one thing I’ve always believed in…The Warner Bros method.  What is that, you say?  That’s when you raise your kids and let them watch all the old Warner Bros cartoons.  You know, Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Elmer Fudd, Yosemite Sam, Road Runner, The Coyote…and the list goes on and on.  And I mean the real versions of those cartoons, not the sterilized versions they would show on TV in the 90′s.

I grew up with Elmer Fudd shooting Daffy Duck in the face, and the only thing that would happen was Daffy’s bill would end up somewhere else on his face, and he’d have a little soot to show for it.  That was funny.  Then someone decided that was too violent and it might make kids actually go around and shoot their friends and family in the face.  So, they changed the cartoons.  Now when Daffy got shot in the face, they’d cut away to a still shot of Bugs Bunny, Elmer Fudd, or maybe a freakin’ bush, just so they wouldn’t show Daffy getting shot in the face.  We still KNEW it happened.  We heard the gunshot, and we’d cut back to Daffy and see his bill on the backside of his head, so all we were missing was the actual visual, but dammit, I wanted that visual.  That was part of the fun!  You see, I wasn’t any more likely to shoot my friends or family in the face because of it, and you know why?  Because I knew it WASN’T REAL!  How did I know that?  Because I was taught it wasn’t real and that wasn’t the way it would REALLY happen in real life.

That’s the real trick, isn’t it?  I was taught it wasn’t real.  I wasn’t just stuck in front of the TV thinking it would raise me and that I would never see anything objectionable.  And that’s the problem with these idiots who made them sterilize my Bugs Bunny.  They didn’t want to take responsibility if their kids shot someone in the face, that they hadn’t taught their kids the difference between real life and cartoons.  They wanted to be able to blame someone else.  A problem that seems to plague this country at times.  It’s McDonald’s fault I spilled Hot Coffee on my crotch!  They should have warned me when I ordered coffee that it would be hot!  I had no idea!  Geez, what a bunch of morons.

So, now I would like to thank Cartoon Network for bringing back all the old Warner Bros cartoons.  Not only bringing them back, but also showing Daffy getting shot in the face during the promos.  That’s classic stuff.  And for those of you that have a problem with that, either change the channel or raise your kids right.

Rabbit Season!  Duck Season!  Fire!  BLAMMO!  Great stuff.

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